[feeling spicy] the nuances of language

I recently posted to my IG Stories about this. Without the space constraints of the Stories format, we can go a little more into detail here.

This was originally in response to a carousel I’d read on an account dedicated to disability, claiming that the term “special needs” was problematic.

One of my modern pet peeves is about language policing, because

  1. You can’t control what other people say, and
  2. not all people with the same marginalized identity share the same preferences

To be honest with you, I personally hate the term “disabled” and prefer to use “people with disabilities,” since I don’t like for “disabled” to define anybody.

And that entire account (as well as other advocates for PWD I’ve heard speak) apparently have no issue with it, so . . .

And to say “special needs” is derogatory or condescending is a projection.

I have total approval for people who require extra accommodations.

In my lifetime as a really good textbook fifth line in Human Design,* people generally have no problem letting me know if I’ve misstepped/misspoken and I’ve never had anyone call me on using this term. This is because the people around whom I’ve used it are able to feel my total approval (i.e., lack of judgment or condemnation) for having special needs. This is why I generally don’t try to “correct” people’s language.

None of this is black and white.

Being a human is complex and nuanced, and we can only hope to heal these rifts in connection by giving people an opportunity to learn with compassion.

Yours,

Pamela

A note on the [feeling spicy] series & my boundaries around it: These are my positions on the subject, and I am definitely not available for debate. If you are able to self-regulate and respond from a grounded place, you are welcome to leave a comment.

Read here for my rules of engagement.

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